Washed by the Water (extremely long but wonderful for me)

After a day of angst yesterday, in which I made myself sick and even more stressed then I ever needed to be, I have decided that I should just listen to God on this matter and pray even harder on it. To anyone that saw me last night, I guess I want to explain why I am really hurt about this. It is not for the reasons you may think, but because I am sick of betrayal and sick of people who claim to be my friends hurting me.  In this situation, it is not so much a betrayal as other times, but it still hurts just as much.  If you want to know more about it, you’ll just have to call me or something because even though I am opening up in this post more than I ever do, I am not going to open up that much.  It has happened to often in mine and my parent’s lives and I want to be done with it.

For those who don’t know. A while ago at our old church Baypointe we went through a pretty big church split. Some of my family’s good friends made accusations against all of us and hurt every one of us more than they intended to I am sure. I have pretended for many years to be optimistic about this whole situation, and every once in a while it will break through what my real feelings are. I was hurt just like the rest of my family, but if all of us were broken, who would be there to pull the family out. So, I stayed as normal as possible and ran with the blows.

Last year I discovered a new band called Needtobreathe. I instantly fell in love with the song, You are Here. So, when their newer CD came out this November, and I heard that they would be in town soon after that, I rushed out to get the CD. Since that time, and after the concert, they have slowly been becoming my favorite band. This song is one that really speaks to me because it is the same story as mine, but without the ending. I have decided to live by this song from now on, and trust in God for everything that comes my way.
If people could pray for me so that I keep this commitment, I need the help. I have a hard time trusting anybody wholeheartedly, probably because of this event, and that has hurt my relationship with God. Thank you.

“Daddy was a preacher,
She was his wife.
Just trying to make the world a little better,
You know, shine a light

People started talking
Just to hear their own voice
Those people tried to accuse my father
Said he’d made the wrong choice

Though it may be painful
You know that time will always tell
Those people have long since gone,
My father never fell.

Even when the rain falls,
Even when the flood starts rising,
Even when the storm comes,
I am washed by the water.

Even when the earth crumbles under my feet,
Even when the ones I love turn around and crucify me
I won’t ever let you down
I won’t fall, won’t fall, won’t fall as long as Your around me.

Even when the rain falls,
Even when the flood starts rising,
Even when the storm comes,
I am washed by the water.

Even when the rain falls,
Even when the flood starts rising,
Even when the storms comes,
I am washed by the water.”